Ever since my grandmother passed I feel like I have been on a search of some sorts.  Jack asked some questions about her dying and I felt helpless that I didn’t have the answer.  We’re not religious people so it’s hard to explain when you’re not sure yourself.  She was the first person close to me that I have lost so I never even thought about it really.  My grandma was very spiritual and I almost feel like she is the one leading me on this search.  I guess I just want to be the best me I can be and the same for my boys.  Maybe I am looking for something to beleive in when I hadn’t really before. Maybe her passin can be looked at as a gift to me of sorts.  It’s opened me up and is making me question and accept things I had not before.  I’m not sure where this will all lead but I feel really good about it.

Today I heard from a friend whom I hadn’t heard from in a while.  I was pretty excited to hear from her talked for a while about staying home and if we wanted more kids and getting together real soon.  It was nice… until she started to tell me about this new business venture she had just got into.  At first I thought “well maybe it’s Tastefully Simple or something like that” but as she went on it sounded more and more like Amway.  Ugh.  Now this person is a very well educated RN and she is the last person that I would ever think would get into a pyramid scam thing.  I just can’t believe it.  I feel bad but I really don’t even want to talk to her anymore.  Why are some people so easy to be bowled over? She went on and on about some people making up to 6 figures and how anyone I got in would be under me. conversation went from being so pleasant to a full sales pitch.  She was not calling for anything but to pull me in and make some $$ off of me.  I’ve never had this happen before.  I’ve just lost all respect for her now.

I just realized I have a blog.  Oops. During the month of December I usually fall out of contact with just about everyone just focusing on who to get what and when I am going to find the time alone to shop and when do i need to send this gift out and who got me what last year so I don’t regift to them.  I think I’ve pretty much got it all under control besides a few little things.  The one think Keith and I do every year that kinda makes people cringe is that we usually go shopping for the boys a couple of days before Christmas.  We never are the types to hav to get whatever hot item they are selling that year and actually by doign that we usually never spend a ridiculous amount of money.  So as of right now my children do not have one gift but come December 21st they will be all set.

Some good freinds of mine suggested to place cold cabbage leaves in my bra to help dry up my milk and help with the soreness of my boobies.  Well I am in the process of potty training Jack and I am constantly bugging him to go on the potty or asking him if he’s got to go or if he has poop.  Today I accused the poor child of pooping and did not realize I was smelling my own stinky self.  Holy cow do I smell like a sewer.  This better work or a will have a few sweet moms to kill.

Ever have that kind of sex where the next day that is all you can think about?  I am having that day right now.  It’s funny because when Keith and I met this was pretty much all our relationship was based on… but we were 18 and had nothing better to do but screw like rabbits.  I can say that without a doubt that part of our relationship has not changed. Well maybe not the frequency but surely the quality. It seems to be getting better and better.  You’d think after 13 years we’d pretty much done everything and then one night with legs over the head he pulls a new trick.  Why can’t I just keep this feeling all of the time?  Like when Clint decides to get up at 4 am and then takes a 1/2 hour nap only to go to bed at 9.  Why can’t there be some type of a button to push to remind me of that contortionist moment my husband put me in? After that 17 hour day when he taps me on the shoulder looking for some why can’t I just remember that exact moment?  Hmmm. If people could do that though I’m not sure what else they’d have time for.  We’ll see what happens tonight.

I picked up this Kettler Car from a resale shop for $10!  The boys love it and mom got out of spending too much $$ on a brand new one. Don’t look at the toy explosion.

Well maybe not the happy part as far as my husband is concerned in this pic.  His mother did this to him.  I can imagine him thinking “I’m a stupid witch and my buddy is a cool ass pirate”.  Poor Keith or Keithy (the horrible nickname his family calls him).

Here are the boys all hopped up on sugar.  The nice thing is that Jack only likes plain chocolate bars so the rest goes to me!!

Today I discovered that my son Jackson is genius.  While I was lying on the floor playing smash the cars on mommies knuckles Jack got caught up in Between the Lions and began to run 2 Hot Wheel cars on my back.  At first I laughed but after about 2 minutes drool came sliding out of the side of my mouth.  Who knew that these stupid little cars could feel so wonderful?  I took total advantage of my 3 year old and urged him to roll on.  He thought it was pretty funny and did for almost 20 minutes on and off.  I have to say it may have been better than the hot rock massage I had before.  I think I may have to tell Miss Andrea  (http://missandrea.typepad.com/) about this technique as I am pretty sure they are not teaching it in any class.

Today some asshole ran a red light and hit me and Jack.  We’re okay just a little damage to the rear panel.  They hit on the drivers side which is where Jack sits.  I am so glad we were high up because that could have been ugly in my car.  Oh and did I mention that fuckwad left the scene?  Thankfully a woman witnessed the whole thing and got the license plate number for me.  I made the report and now all we do is wait.  If the car was stolen then I guess this tool gets off.  What kind of person just flees a scene like that?  My baby could have been hurt.